Ragab (original poster member #82425) posted at 12:31 PM on Thursday, May 21st, 2026
BS keeps saying that he wants to resolve our issues, but I honestly don’t know what "resolve" means to him anymore. He expects me to keep talking about our problems, but I genuinely don’t know what he wants us to discuss all the time. Then he gets upset because I don’t initiate those conversations. I’m not avoiding it intentionally — I truly don’t understand what is expected of me.
Some days are diamonds, some days are stones....
Pogre ( member #86173) posted at 3:44 PM on Thursday, May 21st, 2026
Do you do occasional check ins? Even if it's not a current topic, I know I appreciate when my wife asks simple "how are you doing/feeling" questions, or "do you have any questions for me?" That kind of thing. Even if I don't always have much for a response or questions just knowing it's on her mind and a priority for her, too, let's me know she's not trying to rug sweep or wait for it to blow over.
Is there anything specific? I saw your other thread, and had a thought, but couldn't participate.
[This message edited by Pogre at 3:44 PM, Thursday, May 21st]
Where am I going... and why am I in this handbasket?
1994 ( member #82615) posted at 4:39 PM on Thursday, May 21st, 2026
He may expect you to constantly be working on becoming a safe partner, even now so many years later. Are you reading any books on infidelity? Listening to podcasts? Seeing a therapist? Journaling? Does he know you're posting here? All in all, he may just want you to initiate conversations about your breakthroughs, your challenges, etc, on the path to healing yourself.
